


Gains and Losses

by Symone_Nicole



Series: Soul [3]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII:The Force Awakens
Genre: AU, M/M, Soulmate AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-10
Updated: 2019-10-10
Packaged: 2020-11-28 19:11:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20971610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Symone_Nicole/pseuds/Symone_Nicole
Summary: In a world where people are born without one of their senses until they meet their soulmate, and if one of them die then they will lose that sense again.





	Gains and Losses

Kylo Ren had never “seen” the world or people since the moment he was born. His own weight to carry for having a soulmate. It was rare for people to lose their sense of vision but Kylo Ren adapted like the rest. Unlike the rest, he started to develop his force powers at a young age. Even if all his eyes could see was darkness, with the force he could see others auras or at least their presence in the force. 

The ancients used to believe that the type of sense once loss was a precaution to their love life with their soulmate. If one was born without their hearing than it was said it was to teach them to listen to their mates, to hang on their every word. If it was touch, it meant that their partner was very affectionate or would shower them in gifts. Taste and smell both had similar meanings, and there were too many. It could be that their partner was peculiar, or to say that their relationship would be rockier. If the sense lost sight, it meant that their partner would show them new experiences, as if it was straight out of their wildest dreams.

Kylo didn’t care too much for tales now. He decided if he ever gained his lost sense he would kill his soul mate. It would be easier on him that way, he adjusted to being unable to see. Besides the force showed Kylo everything that he ever needed to know. A soul mate would be a weakness, a distraction. He told himself that it would be easy to just kill. Words are easier said than done.

When Kylo “met” his soulmate he was walking down a corridor on Starkiller base. It was only the two of them in the corridor, Kylo was heading to train and his soulmate was mopping the floor. He gave the sanitation trooper a glance as he walked by and then he started to see white. The white walls, the white floor. He looked down at his gloves and it was black against an endless white. He wondered if it was a force dream but still he turned around and froze in his steps.

It was a green no doubt. Green and brown and the dirty white of the mop. It wasn’t the endless black he was accustomed to. It should have been impossible, the First Order didn’t keep soulmates in the ranks. They wanted soldiers with all of their senses, not just four. He walked back towards the sanitation trooper, ready to kill, but when the trooper looked up at him he halted in his step. As he looked at those endless warm brown eyes, Kylo noticed that he couldn’t do it. He told himself for years that he would--it would be like snapping a twig, but now it was impossible.

He stepped closer, the trooper was honestly uncomfortable with the closeness of their bodies. He was holding up his mop and water was dripping down on his shoulder but he didn’t twitch as Kylo stared at him. Kylo found his soulmate's thoughts were clear as day. If his soulmate knew about their connection it wasn’t clear in his thoughts, but he was scared. Honestly, he had every right to be--especially seconds ago but not now. Kylo wanted him to know that he didn’t have to be afraid of him.

He lifted his hand and noticed how his soulmate twitched away. Kylo paused as he removed his glove before his knuckles gently caressed his soulmate’s face.

“I can never hurt you,” Kylo stated suddenly.

The stormtrooper swallowed before his shoulders started to relax. “I believe you… sir.”

Kylo knew from his thoughts that he did. He himself didn’t know why he suddenly believed him, Kylo’s lips pulled into a frown when he heard his soul mate mutter force mind tricks.

“It’s not!” Kylo started of abrash, “it’s not a mind trick. It’s just--” Kylo groans as he backs out of the stormtroopers space.

“Designation?”

“FN-2817, sir!”

Kylo turned his head as he could sense people coming from around the corner. “I’ll summon for you later, FN-2817.”

FN-2187 thought the whole occurrence with Kylo Ren was strange, odd at best. Kylo Ren’s helmet was entirely in his face and he didn’t die. He lived to tell about this brief encounter. FN-2187 wasn’t much for gossip, and he didn’t have many people he could talk to besides his fellow squadmates, Nines and Slip. 

Nines asked a million questions and said that FN-2187 was lucky to have talked to the apprentice of the supreme leader. Slips argued by mentioning the summons, what could possibly Kylo Ren want with him. Eight-Seven wasn’t sure since the list was limited, Kylo Ren said that he couldn’t hurt him. Eight-Seven believed that he truly did. He never spoke to Kylo Ren, only saw glimpses of the man. His rage, his power, his destruction. And yet, after an intense staring session, a very few words, Eight-Seven believed him.

When Eight-Seven was “summoned”, Kylo showed up after his training simulator and told Captain Phasma he was taking him for the day, he was nervous. He walked behind Kylo in quiet steps all the way to the dorms for high command. Eight-Seven had only been here a few times and that was to clean an officer’s room. There was one room, kept away from the others. Eight-Seven had heard about it--Kylo Ren’s room but he never been down the corridor himself.

The whispers of walls being decorated with his lightsaber were false. He heard all kinds of monstrous things about the corridor down to Kylo’s Ren room. He started to wonder if anyone else besides Kylo and himself and walked down these walls. Eight-Seven didn’t know why he was at peace and he didn’t hesitate to follow behind Kylo into his room.

The last thing Eight-Seven expected was for Kylo to take off his helmet. He didn’t think it came off.

Kylo scoffs, “of course it comes off.” He responded as he placed his helmet on the counter and ran his hands through his hair.

“Take a seat,” Kylo said as he looked back at Eight-Seven over his shoulders. “You can get comfortable if you’d like.”

Kylo had gotten Eight-Seven to his room to talk, but he didn’t know how to start this conversation. They were facing each other. His soulmate had removed his helmet but was sitting with proper posture. Kylo guessed he could understand how it difficult it must be to relax in this situation. Even though his posture screamed relaxed, Kylo himself was out of his comfort zone. They had been sitting and staring at each other for almost 15 minutes, Kylo was staring while Eight-Seven tried to look at everything else in the room besides at Kylo’s face. Kylo’s cheeks flushed when he heard the reason behind it, he cleared his throat to gain the stormtrooper’s attention.

Kylo leaned for in his seat, “how did you do it?”

Eight-Seven quirked a brow, “do what, sir?”

“You know,” Kylo began, he didn’t want to say it. To make it all seem much more real. “How did you enlist without one of your senses.”

Eight-Seven’s face showed immediate confusion, “I didn’t.” Eight-Seven could tell from Kylo’s expression that he didn’t believe him. “Seriously, I’ve always had all my senses.”

“I was born blind,” Kylo said as he started to look at a blank wall. “For 28 years, I was blind until today. Until I looked at you.”

The wheels were turning in Eight-Seven’s head and things were finally starting to click. He shouldn’t have a soulmate--it should be impossible. He knew Kylo wasn’t lying, he didn’t know how he knew but he just knew. There was only one thing to do--to see if it’s true.

Eight-Seven surprised them both when he suddenly crossed the distance between them, crawling into Kylo Ren’s lap as he claimed his lips. It was sloppy and rushed but it felt good, so good. The kiss became deeper before Kylo’s body stilled and he pushed Eight-Seven away, “what do you think you’re doing?!” Kylo’s face bright blushing pink.

“Confirming if it’s true,” Eight-Seven as he started to strip himself of his armor. Eight-Seven first believed Kylo summoned him from sex, he knew it happened between officers and troopers.

Eight-Seven stood there before Kylo in nothing but his issued standard briefs, and Kylo was embarrassed that he got hard at the sight. “What-”

“I’m going to use your fresher,” Eight-Seven said before he leaned in to kiss Kylo. “I need to freshen up and prepare myself, you can join me if you want.”

Kylo was debating on leaving right this second. On walking straight out and never coming back--he would demand that Hux give him another room--hell he would even live down in the basement levels. However, he was already crossing the threshold of his fresher before he even tried to reason with his senses. Kylo wanted to cry, he gained a sense today and they rest were going haywire.

Eight-Seven admits that Kylo was the best lay he ever had. He was hoping for something to happen but he wasn’t sure exactly what. As they laid in Kylo’s bed, Kylo told Eight-Seven that they were variants in soul-mates and perhaps that they were one of them. 

It wasn’t until Jakku that Kylo never felt more like a fool. It was an awakening across the village and he looked only to met by the concerned eyes of his soulmate. He should have considered the force, it wasn’t considered a sense because force-sensitivity wasn’t common. After the fight, Kylo took Eight-Seven to his quarters to celebrate though he noticed his soulmate looked distant. That troubled him--but he didn’t expect that Eight-Seven would free the prisoner and escape.

During the attack on star killer, Kylo was so excited of seeing his mate yield a lightsaber. It filled his mind with thoughts and dreams. He blames himself for being distracted, for not being careful enough. Finn lost his footing, and if Kylo was more careful his saber wouldn’t have struck his beloved’s back.

Rey wanted to kill him for what he had done, luckily, Han Solo stopped her. Finn didn’t tell them but he could tell from his son’s eyes the relationship between him and Finn. So they “kidnapped” Kylo and brought him back to a temporary resistance base. He wouldn’t leave Finn’s side, he could care less about the resistance and their secrets.

His vision had been blurring, the color was draining from his world as he sat beside Finn in med-bay. There was a soft knock at the door, and Kylo didn’t even try to greet his mom as she walked in.

“You’re going to have to go back, Kylo.” She started, “as much as I’m glad you’re here--we can’t keep you in this faux capture much longer.” 

Kylo hung his head, “I can’t. I-I have to be here--” for when he wakes up or when all he sees is endless black.

If he returned now, Snoke would know what was truly troubling and Finn’s existence would be endangered. Kylo couldn’t think of any possible situation of Snoke not finding out--Snoke told him to kill his soulmate if he ever discovered them. He couldn’t even do that.

“I’m not going back,” Kylo said as he suddenly stood up. His words surprised his mother. “Don’t think this means I’m closer to the light--I’m doing it for him.” 

Kylo went far from the base as he did what he needed to do. He had gotten better at keeping Snoke out of certain memories--it goes easier with the distance. With the distance between them know, Kylo went to sever his ties with his master. It took him hours, left him winded. When he came back to the base he collapsed at his mother’s feet from pure exhaustion. 

After Kylo recovered, he resumed waiting by Finn’s side. He didn’t care when Rey was preparing to leave to meet his uncle. He didn’t care about anything else other than Finn.

Kylo was holding Finn’s hand, kissing Finn's knuckles gently, “I love you.” He knew Finn couldn’t hear him but he hoped that he did.

“I love you too,” it was weak and small and surprised Kylo. Kylo looked up suddenly as he saw Finn rubbing his eyes. “Hey.”

“... Hey.” Kylo responded before he started to stand up, “I should go tell them you’re awake.” He was so happy, but he couldn’t forget that he was the one that put Finn in medbay.

Finn grabbed Kylo’s hand, “it’s not your fault. You told me to always watch my footing.”

“It is.”

“It’s not,” Finn mumbles then sighs. “Just get up here and hold me already.”

That was something Kylo could do. Being careful of the cords, Kylo managed to get in the bed next to Finn. Finn rolled in Kylo’s arms, his cheek pressed against Kylo’s chest. “Sleep,” Finn said, his voice still drowsy.

“I spent my whole life looking at nothing,” Kylo said as he caressed Finn’s cheek. “I want to spend the rest of it looking at you.”

Finn smiled softly as he went to kiss Kylo’s lips gently. “Rest, love.”

That’s how Leia Organa found her son and his soulmate, asleep in a bed too small and cuddled in each other's arms. 

**Author's Note:**

> Ah, another soulmate AU. I hope you enjoyed this short work! Thanks for reading!  
<3  
SN


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